Divorcing couples almost always start at completely different places: one has been thinking about it for a long time, and one is completely caught off guard. Beth Proudfoot, LFMT, after thirty years of marriage, was shocked to her core. Given the choice, though, she decided on a Collaborative Divorce. What followed was a complete change in her life trajectory.
“For weeks after my spouse told me he wanted a divorce, I was deeply sad and angry and confused. I found that when I was anywhere near him, I literally couldn’t speak,” said Proudfoot. “But my lawyer and the Collaborative Divorce team helped me to find my voice. The divorce process supported me to have the courage to start a new practice, eventually becoming a trained mediator, a Collaborative Divorce coach and professional speaker.” Unlike a high-conflict litigated divorce, Collaborative Divorce allows room to rewrite the lives of those going through the divorce and to set their own pace for the process.
There has been a significant rise in divorce filings since the Covid-19 pandemic because of enforced isolation with a spouse and disagreements over vaccinations. Due to the rise in divorce. Collaborative Practice California (CPCAL) and International Academy of Collaborative Professionals (IACP) are focusing attention on a divorce process that is designed to reduce the conflict and avoid long waits for a court date. The Collaborative Divorce process gives couples the opportunity to divorce respectfully.
October 30 – November 5, 2021, is Divorce with Respect Week in California. More than 200 California divorce professionals have agreed to provide free 30-minute divorce consultations to help people understand about their divorce options. Consultation options include talking to mental health professionals who can address worries about the children, divorce financial professionals who can answer financial questions or with divorce attorneys. The consultation is informational and designed to help individuals learn how they could manage their divorce with respect and dignity. Anyone interested in scheduling a free consultation with a divorce coach, financial professional or attorney during Divorce with Respect Week should go to www.divorcewithrespectweek.com filings and an overcrowded court system
“Divorcing with respect is possible, even if you start out with mistrust and bitterness. But you have to take that first step of choosing the Collaborative process, instead of going down the traditional road of adversarial litigation. Even with the best of intentions, we all need support to rise above the anger of the moment and come to a place of wisdom.
‘The end result for my family was that we ended up with a fair settlement that was good for both of us,” added Proudfoot. “It doesn’t matter where you’re starting. In the end, we found that our divorce process enabled us to do what was best for our kids, and best for me and my ex. It was a wise thing to do. And for me, just experiencing the effects of skillful conflict resolution was life changing. Oh? We don’t have to fight it out? How revolutionary!”
Divorce with Respect Week will kick off with Collaborative Divorce Day on October 30, 2021, as part of International Academy of Collaborative Professional’s Annual Forum in San Diego. This event will bring hundreds of Collaborative professionals from around the world to San Diego.