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Divorce, Kids and Co-Parenting

May 25, 2021 By Rebecca Medina

divorce and co-parenting

A major question when parents’ divorce is how to best provide for the
interests of their children.  A parenting plan answers that question and gives parents a structure to work with as they learn the co-parenting skills that will reduce conflict between them and provide their children the stability they need.

What is a Co-Parenting Plan?

A co-parenting plan is a written document that memorializes how the
children are going to spend time with each one of their parents.  It provides
clear guidelines and expectations as to how time is going to be divided.

Benefits of a Co-Parenting Plan

There are many benefits to both parents and children to have a written co-
parenting plan.  Some of those benefits include:

  • It provides consistency for the children.  They know when they will be staying at which parent’s home.
  • It takes into account the parent’s work schedules.
  • It can provide for children’s school vacations and holidays.
  • It considers the children’s extracurricular activities.
  • It may outline whether the children will go to counseling.
  • Articulates whether the parents will have shared legal custody, which means they will share decision-making.

Some other aspects of a parenting plan that courts often want to see in the
plan include:

  • Making sure both parents are on the school’s list for communication,
    getting grades, picking up the children after school or when they are
    sick.
  • Parents agree to keep the other parent informed of any after-school
    activities like school plays, band concerts, teacher conferences, etc.
  • Parents also agree that the parent who has the children with them will
    allow the other parent to contact the children by texting, emailing, or
    FaceTime.
Why Does the Plan Have to be in Writing and Filed with the Court?

When parents are amicable, they often wonder why the parenting plan
must be in writing and filed with the court.  The written document is like a
road map to refer to for parents and it can act as a default plan when there
are questions in the future about how to handle certain situations.

In higher conflict situations, it provides a set of instructions or guidelines on
how to handle situations that arise with the children.  In those cases, the
more details that are in the plan the easier it will be for both the parents and
children.  They can refer to the plan and engage in respectful
communication with each other.  If the parenting plan is filed by the Court, it
can be enforced in higher conflict situations.

The focus of the parenting plan is always on the best interest of the
children.  The plan can be modified when necessary.

The Law Office of Rebecca Medina can assist you with your parenting plan
whether you are using Mediation or a Collaborative Divorce
process. Contact us to schedule a consultation and learn more about how
we can help you with any aspect of your divorce or parenting plan.

Filed Under: Blog Tagged With: Co-Parenting, Divorce

About Rebecca Medina

Rebecca Medina is a Collaborative Attorney practicing throughout Central Valley and San Diego Counties. She advocates non-adversarial methods in family law to avoid unnecessary polarization as well as added emotional and financial costs.
Rebecca’s Profile | Rebecca’s Website

What our clients are saying…

Anonymous Client

I think this is probably true of a lot of marriages that end in divorce: neither one of us felt “heard.” The [collaborative] process was an eye-opener… and an “ear-opener” I guess you’d say.  We each got to say our piece.  And, I can’t speak for my ex, but I felt she “got” what I was talking about in a deep way.  To me, that was what made my divorce really a completion.  When we were done, we were DONE.  And now we’re okay parents together.  I’m not mad at her, she’s not mad at me.  I’m really grateful to [my coach], for showing me the way.

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